So this is it. I have officially finished my last day of classes. EVER. (unless I would decide to go back to school sometime, but right now it doesn't look like I will). I have some final exams to take, a 5K to run, pancakes to eat, packing to do, one more day of work, and then I'm out of here. Its kinda wierd to think that this time next week, I will be at home again. I always hate moving home. It means moving back into a room that I have to share with a slob, endure countless interrogations from parents (really, a total loss of privacy), and really reverting back to the picture my parents have drawn in their head of what "Karen" should be. This picture is outdated, faded and barely recognizable as myself. But on the plus side of things: its only temporary, the UP is gorgeous in the spring/summer, and I'll get to hang out with Jo and Brian again. I might play in some community bands too. Then there's a little thing called my wedding.

I'm going to Oklahoma on May 8th. The only thing that sucks about that is the fact that I have to fly out of Green Bay instead of Iron Mountain. And I'll have to leave at 6am to get to the airport on time. Joy Joy... but at least I get to see my honey. I get to see him for his birthday (this will be the first time). I'm making a cake, I've got a great birthday present, and just the fact that I'm going to be there visiting will totally make his day. :) I can't wait to go !!! (plus, I have a really awesome secret I can't wait to tell him about, but I'm waiting so I can see the look on his face when I tell him. He better not have no reaction at all, because that would totally bum me out.

Well its time to get back to work. One more hour......

This time last year:

"Thursday, April 06, 2006

This weekend is the Relay for Life. I'm debating whether or not I want to go and walk around. I could have a total uplifting experience about the whole thing. Or on the other hand it could bring up a whole lot of memories that I don't want to recall just yet. I definitely haven't dealt with all of the feelings I have about what has happened to me, and feel like I'm not ready to just yet. I still deal with it all humorously, but the only thing to keep me from crying is laughing. That's why I laugh and make jokes about things. Inside is just a scared little girl that has so much anger and frustration built up, someone who I let few people see."

Today starts this year's relay. And ever since I got up this morning, I've been a nervous wreck. I have a huuuge knot in my stomach, I'm anxious and on the verge of tears just thinking about going. I know I signed up to do some stuff today, but I think I'm going to have to skip going. I can't handle this yet.

This week has definitely gone by fast.

Easter weekend was nice. My family came to visit and we relaxed most of the time. Emily had ECT on Friday and they drove on Saturday so she wasn't doing much else than sleeping. We watched some movies together and ate a nice Easter ham dinner and then they left. I had a paper due on Wednesday and was stressing out a lot about that. I got it done on time though. I also had two tests that day too. My SS & ET professor cancelled our homework assignments for the rest of the semester. I'm not sure why. It makes me happy and sad about it though. That class takes up sooo much time, about the same amount as all the other classes combined. So that's good. The bad part is that my other assignments are worth more. Oh well...

Matt and I are just about finished with our honeymood planning. I think its more fun than planning the wedding. YAY VACATIONS! :) Matt and I found a a nice hotel (fair priced too) that we'd stay in to break up our travel to our honeymoon spot (Sparta). It's not that far, but why not stop one day somewhere else? The only problem is that this nice hotel is in Marshfield. I've had such a bad feeling EVERY time that I went to this town that I'm not sure if it'll carry over to a "pleasure stop". I'll either be okay with going there or it'll suck BIG time. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. This weekend is Relay for Life, so maybe if I can handle that, I can handle a honeymoon stop in Marshfield...... I'll decide after this weekend.

That's about all we have left until I get home and can go out and physically buy things. Next step is flowers. I've been trying to get a hold of Aunt Carol (she volunteered to help me with the arrangements), but so far she hasn't called me back.

Well I'm working now and will be alone later, so I might write more later.

Its raining. That bums me out.
Its supposed to snow tommorrow! That bums me out.
I have a bunch of homework to do and no desire to do it. That bums me out.
My back kinda hurts. That bums me out.
Family prolly won't come to visit once they see the weather forecast, even though it's just for rain. That bums me out.

I need a good long nap and to run this feeling away. I'm planning to go to the SAC and run on a treadmill with my music playing. Maybe a runner's high will trump the fact that it's cold and icky outside. We shall see.....

On the plus side, it's nearly lunch time! I'm getting hungry.... *rubs tummy and scolds stomach monster* quiet down in there!!!